Cat

Cat Facts

Cat descended from Lister’s cat, Frankenstein, which was safely sealed in the hold when the radiation leak struck.

He is the son of a cripple and an idiot.

He was educated at Kitty School.

His main hobbies are eating, looking good, sleeping, and searching for sex.

He makes his own clothes, and even launders them with his tongue.

He needs at least nine or ten daily naps to get enough energy for his main snooze.

History of the Cat Race
The cat race(Felis Sapiens) worshipped Dave Lister, or Cloister the Stupid as they knew him. Their religion believed that when Cloister the Stupid returns that he would lead the Cats to the promised land of Fuchal.  The book also tells of the Holy Mother, Frankenstein, and her virgin birth, and the concept that heaven was a Hot Dog and Doughnut Diner. This myth resulted in the holy war, lasting for thousands of years, as the two sides fought over what color the cardboard hats should be, red or blue (ironically, Lister intended for them to be green).  After many casualties, two huge arks were produced, and using Lister’s laundry list as a star chart, the two arks set off in different directions in search of Fuchal.  One ark crashed into an asteroid, the other flew off into deep space, never to be seen again. 

    Send your comments and questions to webmistress@calcon.net
    Red Dwarf copyright © 1993 Grant Naylor Productions
    This website copyright © 2003 pattycakes
    Site last updated: Saturday, October 08, 2005

    Visit My Home Page